Discovering the deep pools

"...we live and work so fast we rarely have time to go deep. Such is the maddening pace of our life that we are often too manic, too busy, and too hyper to really get to know ourselves. Occasionally, we may enjoy some fleeting awareness of our true talent, but these peak experiences are not normal. Mostly, we get by and make do with the little we know about ourselves, and rarely if ever do we dip our toes into the deep pools of vision and creativity and beauty that exist inside us." Robert Holden

So this is what I want to do with my books, I think. Discover the deep pools of my characters. Which, I think, requires that I discover the deep pools in my own life first.

Boy, this is going to be slow going! I'm used to writing 4 books per year for Harlequin Intrigue.

A famous author once said in Oprah magazine that a writer should spend 3 months writing a book, then the rest of the year editing it. I laughed long and hard at that. But now I think I'd like to try it. Spend proper time on planning, even just on selecting a project. Really figure out a direction I want to go to for the next stretch.

It's a little scary to committ that kind of time to a book that might or might not get published. Especially since I like to eat regularly and the bills keep coming right on schedule.

So here is my question: Is it better to leap off the cliff and risk crashing, or never leap and go through life without ever finding out whether you could fly?